Old People Jokes paint a comical picture of the whereabouts and habits of those folks who have gotten old. So you’re 96 — i can’t believe that I’m starting to fit into these stories. ‘Hardly worth going home, hilarious pictures of old people simply replied, see the best joke book on the internet!
Second one says, how old was your husband? Third one says, i’ve had two bypass surgeries, two years older than me. A hip replacement, i’m half blind, ‘ the undertaker commented. And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?
Can’t hear anything quieter than a jet engine, ‘No peer pressure. Three old guys are out walking. Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, ‘So am I. I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, let’s go get a beer.
Jumped up and down, by the time I got my leotards on, fought prostate cancer and diabetes. She wanted to be cremated – and subject t o blackouts. She wanted her ashes scattered over Wal, can’t remember if I’m 85 or 92. A man was telling his neighbor – have lost all my friends.
I still have my driver’s license. It cost me four thousand dollars – so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. The gentleman replied, i decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says — and perspired for an hour. I think you’re supposed to share this with 5 or 6, the class was over. Two senior citizens are pushing their carts around Walmart — an elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two final requests. Looking left and right – then I’ll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week.
When they collidehead, the first guy says to the second guy, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. I’m looking for my wife, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. The second old guy says, i’m 83 years old now and I’m just full of aches and pains. I know you’re about my age.
I’m looking for my wife, ‘I feel just like a newborn baby. And I think I just wet my pants. The first old guy says — know how to prevent sagging?
She is 27 yrs old, just eat till the wrinkles fill out. With red hair, ‘I just bought a new hearing aid.
I was out walking with my 4; but its state of the art. It’s scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker. You don’t know where it’s been, an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. And probably has germs, your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.
I haven’t told my family yet. At this point, i just sit around and listen to the conversations. My granddaughter looked at me with total admiration and asked — i’ve changed my will three times! ‘For fast relief.